Kathy Worthington 1950 - 2007
Welcome - Anne Q. Racer
Reading of the Obituary - Marie Duffin
Remembering Kathy - Luci Malin
Musical Number - Holly Miller and P.R. Banks
Madrina - Mandy Q. Racer
Musical Number - Sergei Rachmaninoff violin piece by Bronwen Beecher
Musical Number - Holly Miller and P.R. Banks
Special thanks to the Utah Pride Center and all those who organized and participated in this memorial
03/30/2009 by Lucy
My name is Lucy. I am Kathy Worthington's oldest daughter. I knew her better than just about anyone on this earth and what I can tell you is that my mother did not waste a day in her life. She lived and loved to the fullest and she never backed down from a fight for what was right.
Those of you who have nothing better to do than to come to a "tribute" site to spread your hate are no doubt the one's who are wasting your lives as hateful cowards. It is people like you that are ruining your church and driving members away. Last I checked your religion was supposed to be about spreading love in the world and all you do is spend time spreading hate.
If there is something on the other side of this world, I guarantee that you hateful cowards are not invited. I can also guarantee that when you die, if there is someone that actually cares enough about you to create a tribute site in your name, that I will not visit it to post disgusting comments. I would never think to stoop so low.
For those of you that have visited this site to actually pay tribute to my mother, I just want to say thank you. I miss her everyday of my life but it brings me comfort to know that she touched so many lives. I am so proud to be her daughter and I feel so lucky to have had such a wonderful mother and friend.
Oh Kathy, for all we shared and all we did, you were a lovely friend. I was shocked to learn of both yours and Sara's passings. May you both find peace now. You touched so many lives. Know that many love you! Even though I no longer live in SLC, I shall miss you both. I so loved our women's group! Rest well, my friend. Much love, Susan - 02/04/2014
I just read about Kathy and here wonderful work and I felt compelled to leave a comment. Regardless of whether you agree or disagree with her work, she was a beacon of light in many peoples lives. Its unfortunate that there are still people out there that have so much hate. I commend you for keeping the postings on here, although they are so ugly I would have deleted them. May god bless you and your family. - 02/02/2010 - andrea r
Maybe if not each and every day, personal and heartfelt dreams can continue to refresh your memories, of your wonderful mom. Joey - 01/01/2010 - joseph's myth
To All Those Who Consider Themselves "Ex-Mormons" - There is no such thing - ex-husbands, ex-wives, YES. Mormon, NO. You were NEVER a follower, so how can you consider yourself - an EX? God will give you what you want - if you choose not to be a member just tell him. He will not force you to be a member if you choose NOT to be. Kathy had nothing to do with you leaving the church. You created the struggle within yourself, then someone comes along and tells you want you want to hear. The rest is history.
To Lucy (daughter). Do you really expect kind and loving remarks from Mormons when your website trashes their very beliefs? Impossible!! - 09/20/2009 - The Messenger
Not all Mormons will make it to the Celestial kingdom. Those that fight against Zion, being deceived, cannot be there either. Be looking for my music on the internet to describe how eternally saving it is to be LDS. Quit kicking against the pricks and return to Zion. - 06/30/2009 - email@example.com - J. Brian Ballard
I used the information that Kathy provided on her website to resign from the LDS church in 2006. Over and over I am thankful that this information was available to me. Even though Kathy never knew me she greatly helped me with one of the best decisions of my life. Thank you Kathy. - 05/20/2010 - Heather K.
Irregardless of whether you support or do not support someone helping others find freedom, and irregardless of their sexual orientation or religious background, the Bible is very clear on one thing. "Judge not, lest ye be judged." I could provide you with the scriptural links, but if you are familiar with the Bible at all, you should be able to find them yourself. The Bible also speaks very clearly about those who hastily go for the speck in another's eye, ignoring the plank in their own.
Apparently your religious beliefs do not give you room to consider other beliefs besides your own religious restrictions. The 11th Article of (the Mormon) Faith would imply that [the Mormons] claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of [their own] conscience, and allow all men the same privilege let them worship how, where, or what they may.
So, get off your pedestals and 'allow all men (and women) the same privilege. Allow all men (and women) to worship how, where, or what they may'.
If some people would just open their eyes and READ the reality of the Mormon religion, even go so far as to read the Mormon historical documents and approved literature... and pay attention to God when He reveals the truth, maybe more could escape the confines of Mormonism.
Take a look at the inverted pentagrams on the Mormon Temples. Look at how Mormon Temple Rituals are just versions of Masonic Temple Rituals. There's nothing inspired in that temple, it's "borrowed" from Joseph Smiths short Masonic membership. Joseph Smith married multiple women before the "inspired" revelation, some women as young as 14 and some who were already married to other men. OPEN YOUR EYES PEOPLE!!!
Don't be afraid to walk away and find real freedom. Although the temple rituals suggest your throat be sliced, or your bowels cut out, should you speak that which is done in secret..... it's nothing more than a scare tactic. Your temple name is the same name given to everyone going for the first time, on that particular day. BE FREE!
It's more important to have a relationship with God and Jesus, than to live according to a religions dictates.... and by the way, religion is man-made.
Jesus is the only way, the only truth, and the only way to life everlasting.
- 05/04/2010 - Dez
I was so shocked and saddened to hear of Kathy's passing. I no longer live in Utah, so that was one of the reasons that I didn't hear about it until now (2009). I met Kathy when she chaired a Women's Group. This was a God-send for me. I so enjoyed meeting other lesbians, talking and helping each other. Kathy was a great influence. I was so happy for her when she met Sara. They truly had a wonderful relationship. The Gay Community in Utah has suffered a huge loss by Kathy's passing. Peace, Kathy..........Susan - 04/13/2009 - Susan
If anyone ever doubted that mormonism was a repugnant, soul-destroying sham-church, then let them read the ugly comments posted here by its defenders. And these vile people think themselves Christian? Let mormonism sink into the oozing slime from which it festered and erupted, taking its malodorous vapours with it.
I know of Kathy only what I have read - but she sounds a remarkable person, one absolutely deserving of being remembered as a contributor of good. - 04/12/2009 - Appalled
Kathy, I miss you a lot, think about you almost every day. And all the good that you did for every one. We'll I'm finally doing it, I'm taking my name out/off the Church records. We talked about it for 15 years.
K.F. and I talk and miss all the time together. Love you gal and miss you. See you soon. - 04/06/2009 - Lois Elder
Talk about goodness and setting the proper example - as a human being. Some people bring out the best in others and leave the world a far better place than what they found it. Gone but never forgotten. - 04/02/2009 - wisedup
She is someone whom we should all try and emulate With her big heart and her will to reach out and love others despite her personal comfort, she let her heart remain open and available for so many people.
It is taking steps like this to be there for others, to love and show compassion and understanding which makes our world that much better for all of us. I'm sad she is gone because we needed her voice, we needed her heart, and we needed her shoulders to help us all along the way.
So let's keep that spirit alive by reaching out and loving and helping others along their way. We're not alone, and Kathy showed that in spades. - 04/02/2009 - Chad (Swedeboy) Spjut
She made my transition so much easier When I was so frustrated with the resignation process (bishop holding a disciplinary council after I gave him my resignation letter), Kathy was the one who helped me stand up for myself and convinced me not to attend the council, which I did not. But she even offered to come and attend with me if I decided that I would.
Then when they were still holding up my final papers, she gave me the name of a guy at Mr. Dodge's office and told me to call him and let him know that Kathy Worthington gave me his number and told me he would help me. It was amazing. As soon as I dropped her name he magically found my letter which had been "overlooked" and told me that my letter would be in the mail the next day, which it was.
I remember the SLC exmo get-togethers with Kathy and sometimes Sarah, when she was feeling OK. They were both quiet and unassuming. But when Kathy had a cause, she attacked it with her dignified determination. I really cherish the mornings we'd clean the highway and then go to breakfast. She was truly a gentle giant and the world will never be the same without her. - 04/01/2009 - Merilynn
Yes, it was funny to see how just the mention of her name would make them JUMP! I miss her a lot. Having someone you can count on is a rare thing. - 04/01/2009 - Susan I/S
I sent a cc of my resignation letter to her and she sent me a congrats note! She helped to light up the "EXIT" sign for so many of us. - 04/01/2009 - JoAnn
What would Jesus do? Would he post hateful comments here?
No, he would not.
Jesus said love as Jesus loved, including love our enemies. Bless our enemies.
You who claim to follow Jesus, take a good hard look at yourselves in your mirrors.
You are you following when you spread hate?
Not Jesus, not at all.
All you posting hate are following the god of this world, make no doubt about that. - 03/31/2009 - WWJD
As a member of the church contemplating whether or not to submit my resignation, I appreciate Kathy's advice. However, it is not what Kathy said or did that persuades me to leave the church, it is the slanderous, offensive, uneducated, foul, and disrespectful comments from people on this site who think they are living the model Mormon-lifestyle that remind me what I want to distance myself from. It is you people who should be ashamed of yourselves. - 03/30/2009 - Jeff W.
I remember when I decided to leave the church and found her web site. What a help! I emailed her when it seemed nothing was happening and she calmed me down in her reply (Sep '06). Whenever I think about the whole ordeal - which is becoming less and less as time goes by - I thank her for putting up a web site that was perfect. She knew what she was doing and did well in the cause. - 03/28/2009 - Lance
Sorry about the loss, I was looking for information on how to become a member of the mormon chuch again...I lost my membership from the church with the help of this site in Spanish 5 years ago. Now, I am finding out that I need the gospel in my life ...Where to write them back to activate my membership again? Should I contact the local chuch and ask them about the process.....Do they take ex-members back again?...I will appreciate any information at firstname.lastname@example.org - 03/02/2009 - Antonieta
I never had the chance to meet Kathy, but this site gave me the help I was looking for to resign from the mormon church and to start a better, more fulfilling life. Thank you, Kathy and thank you to those who continue to maintain this site. - 01/08/2009 - Jeremy D.
What a sad and wasted life this Kathy has lived. Why someone who is not even a member of the LDS church protest and fight a positive force in this world. She was a hateful revegeful lesbian whore. May she suffer shame and pain for all time. - 01/07/2009 - anon
And for the rest of your loosers instead of complaing about a church you used to or never did belong too move on with your lives!!!!! - 12/19/2008 - Wasted Life
it is NOT hard to resign from the mormon church. it is sad that you people have to target a religion, to dedicate you life to something so LAME as to "helping people remove their names from the records of that church" is a major waste of a lifetime. i feel bad that this lady wasted her life and i am embarressed for her and all of you. how hateful can you be? - 11/16/2008 - wow
I can't help but read all of these comments and feel deeply saddened by the number of people who have left the fold of Christ. I would like to take this opportunity to publicly share what I know to be true. God is the father of us all and loves us regardless of our choices. Because of that love, He allowed His Son, Jesus Christ, to come to this earth and suffer for us, resulting in the possibility for repentance. He suffered and died, but the most important part of it all is that he overcame the suffering and death. Jesus Christ lives today as the Savior of us all, but even though Christ suffered for our sins, he didn't eliminate our own responsibility. I know that if we accept the atonement through faith in Jesus Christ and sincere repentance that we can return to live with our Father. Because God loves us so much, He has continually reached out to His children through prophets, not only in our day, but from the very beginning of the human race.
The Priesthood is real. I have seen it's power and I know many of you have as well. I urge you to remember those spiritual experiences. Allow the seed of faith to once again be planted and nourished in your heart and begin to grow. I wish you all the best of luck. You will be in my prayers. - 11/13/2008 - Nate
Kathy, not that your reading this, I love the church. I won't be needing your services. Enjoy eternal life. See you soon. - 11/13/2008 - Mormonboy
IT'S REALLY TOO BAD THE WORLD HAS LOST SUCH A PIECE OF CRAP INDIVIDUAL. WHAT A LOSER AS ARE THE REST OF YOU. HAVE YOU NOTHING BETTER TO DO THAN TRY TO LEAD PEOPLE ASTRAY? YOU ARE NOT MAKING A DIFFERENCE IN ANYONE'S LIFE. IF SOMEONE WANTS TO LEAVE THE CHURCH THEY ALREADY KNOW HOW. I FEEL EXTREMELY SORRY FOR YOU ALL.
AT LEAST KATHY CAN NOW SEE THE ERROR OF HER WAYS AS MANY OF YOU SURELY WILL SOON. - 11/12/2008 - NUNYADAMBIZNESS@AOL.COM - sickened_by_you
I noticed that there are some extremely ugly comments on the Kathy Worthington memorial site attached to this website. I fully support people's right to speak, but I'm wondering if it's possible to have the truly insulting and malicious comments removed. Those people never knew Kathy, and have no place to speak such ugly words about such an incredible woman. Again, I respect if you choose not to, but hope for her family's sake that you might choose to remove the ugliness.
Thanks, Marie - 11/11/2008
Kathy, A great voice such as yours will truly be missed. Your work has and will continue to help many. Thank you for giving so many courage and information to resign. My hearts wish is that your rest is peaceful and glorious. YOU ARE MISSED! - 10/19/2008 - anon
I wonder if she wishes to come back now to repair all the damage she caused... Every knee shall bend and every tongue confess... I guess she knows the truth now. - 09/19/2008 - microbioguy74
I am surprised and saddened to learn of Kathy's passing. I left the LDS Church while serving as Relief Society president in November of 2000. After several attempts to resign from church membership, with a very uncooperative bishop and stake president trying to keep me from doing so, I was put in contact with Kathy.
The Church had tried to intimidate me by setting up a Bishop's Court on charges of "apostasy." All I did was want to leave Mormonism after finding out about the revised history, distortions, and fabrications, but all the Church was concerned about was "damage control" due to the position of authority and influence I had.
After months of dragging their feet, the stake president submitted my resignation papers to the Church after one phone call from Kathy! I am very grateful for the help she gave me and countless others. Her dedication and service will always be remembered. My deepest sympathy goes out to her family and loved ones. - 07/23/2008 - Tracy C
This person has touched so many people and yet she has also led many people away from the church simply cos many dont think for themselves and cant stand on their own feet without standing with many becos they are afraid.. the church will move forward with or without yous and your judgment day will surely come to pass and only then will you ever understand anything truths but it will most probably be too late for those who have willfully denied the church and turn your backs.. you will be judged out of your own books anyway and if you start now to remedy this, then perhaps you have a chance if you repent, this person now sits amongst those in the spirit prison and she knows something that yous all dont know until you pass thru the veil on the other side and then the penny-will-drop... it will too late - 05/10/2008 - ANON
Kathy Worthington was a beacon in the human struggle, one brave person representing so many groups- women, gays, postal employees, exmos...There were representatives from all her disparate groups, shoulder to shoulder, woven into a beautiful tapestry of love at the celebration of her life held at the Jewish Center. With the rigid grid of Brigham Young's city stretched out below, one person after another came forward to talk about how she helped them at a crucial moment, made them laugh, made the road less painful. She is, to me, the patron saint of the exmormon movement. - 02/26/2008 - anagrammy
Thank you Kathy Worthington. It's hard to believe that a year has already passed since Kathly left us. Although I only knew her through exchanged e-mails and her useful and compassionate work at mormonnomore.org, I would like to remember her as a friend.
The world could use a few more Kathys in it. - 02/26/2008 - Odell Campbell
That was a really rough day a year ago when I got the note and passed it on to Susan I/S . . . Susan picked up that it was right after the anniversary of Sara's death . . .
Kathy and I had several friends in common outside the ex-Mormon community, and attending her service did allow me to connect with them, for which I'm grateful . . .
One of the giants I've been privileged to walk with on this journey . . . - 02/26/2008 - SL Cabbie
What memories. I loved cleaning the highway with Kathy and then going for breakfast, the old SLC exmo get-togethers with her and Sara, lunch at exmo conference with her. She was just one of the most genuine, dedicated and interesting people I've known.
One of my favorite movie lines is from an old 70s movie "The Other Side of the Mountain." It was spoken by Jill Kinmont after the death of her fiance,
"How lucky I am to have know someone or something, that saying goodbye to was so damned awful."
I've thought that about Kathy. How lucky we are to have known someone like her. - 02/26/2008 - NoLihoma
Loved Kathy. How wonderful she was. - 02/26/2008 - FoA
A year? Yet it only seems like a few months ago.
She is still sadly missed even by those of us who only emailed her. Because she had such a major and positive influence on the lives of thousands all over the world. And her great work continues. - 02/26/2008 - Matt
I never would have bothered resigning from the LDS Church if it wasn't for her website. n/t - 02/26/2008 - Sonny Perdition
There is irony in the fact that so many of us "served" missions bringing a handful of people into the Church, if that. Yet this one woman single handedly touched thousands, including myself, to see the light and have the courage to take the steps to move forward. Not only that, she gave us the skills to do so. Godspeed, Sister Worthington. - 02/26/2008 - BrerRabbit
So much courage, so much heart. A sad anniversary. I miss you Kathy Worthington. - 02/26/2008 - Susan I/S
A sad anniversary. I miss you Kathy Worthington. Kathy gave so much of herself and her time to helping others. Her death was tragic and we miss her. - 02/26/2008 - Eric K
This is such "baloney", these comments are nice but I am also sure that most of these people who wanted out of the church did not make it known to the Bishop or other church leaders that they wanted their names off the church rolls. I was often taked with having to contact in-active members of the church, some did not want to come back because of Word of wisdom issues and they felt ashamed, others were just to mad to talk to us. how can I know their wishes if they refuse to let me know? Good luck in in your search for another church and wish you all the very best. - 12/25/2007 - anon
I can't believe I didn't get to meet this old bag before she went to rot in Hell with Lucifer himself!!! She was a crazy lesbian that had a lot of hate stored up inside her. The world is a much stronger place without Kathy!!! - 12/05/2007 - Phil D.
I didn't know her, but I imagine she was as big a jackass as all you. - 12/04/2007 - Smarter than you
I knew Kathy when I lived in Salt Lake City. After making some incredible mistakes in my youth and getting lambasted by the local political gay community at the time, Kathy was one of a few people that still accepted me. I emailed her the a few years ago when I finally took the time to remove my name from the Church records. - 10/09/2007 - Chris
I never knew Kathy and she has now left this earth, and is in the presence of the one TRUE God :D What a wonderful thing that someone can continue to help others even after they have moved on.
Tomorrow September 19th would be 21 years since I was baptized and Confirmed in the LDS church. Today I resigned from religion thanks to the help I found on www.mormonnomore.com! Thank you to Kathy and whomever continues this work, it is not in vain! - 09/18/2007 - E. Ward
Another lesbian bites the dust..!!!!! - 08/14/2007 - anon
Don't know who Kathy was, but seems like she wasted a lot of time on this crap. - 07/25/2007 - Sam
My wife and I had neither the honor nor the privilege to know Mrs. Kathy Worthington, but we are just reading now about what she did for all the people that have realized about this well prepared fraud.
We as a couple really appreciate what she did for all of us because her work will continue echoing not only in our lives, but also in the live of so many others. - 06/09/2007 - anon
Here are the waters of "Ex-"Mormons (for thus were "some" called) and now, as ye are desirous to come "out of" the fold of God, and to be called "once again" his people, and are willing to bear one another?s burdens, that they may be light; Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things!
May the Lord bless you and keep you, may the Lord make his face shine upon you, and give you peace, and give you peace, and give you peace.....forever! - 03/16/2007 - Jodimode
I really wish that words came easy in times like these. My heart aches and I am still in shock about it all. I keep thinking that it's some sort of weird dream. I just wish I would have had one more time to see her. It really makes you appreciate those around you and to have an urge to let them know how important they are to you.
Kathy taught me a lot. She was always kind, generous, and a fantastic person to be around and talk with. She gave me the courage to stand up and be proud of being exmormon. More importantly she helped me understand myself at a time I was lost and confused. She became one of my heros then and she will always remain so. Thank you, Kathy for all you have given to me and this life. Thank you, for showing me how to embrace who I am and to shout it out to the world. - 03/16/2007 - Katie (giggles)
We enjoyed gatherings in Kathy's home and she was so gracious. Her website helped us get our names off the records. It makes me sad to think of how down she must have been in her private moments. We will miss her. - 03/09/2007 - Jim
I met Kathy shortly after moving to Davis county, when I helped with a highway cleanup, again with Sara at an exmo dinner out, and just a few months ago at her home for a viewing of a missionary-related movie that was being made. Among all the conversation I most remember talking to her about how we both loved our cats.
What a wonderful person and such a great loss. Per her wishes, I will donate to Best Friends in her name, and I may consider resigning now. - 03/09/2007 - Denise
Kathy was beyond helpful to me, and I know to countless others, in our quest to leave the LDS church. She was gracious and kind in my communications with her, and I feel so sad at this news.
My thoughts are with her family tonight. - Looking in
Thanks and fondness to Kathy. Condolences to her family. It hasn't been very long since Kathy lost her partner. What an example she was. Thanks, ink.
I am speechless and sad at her passing. She was a guiding light to so many trying to find their way out of TSCC. She will be missed terribly. My deepest condolences to her family. - Skunk Puppet
What a terrible loss. She will sorely be missed. What a wonderful person. I'm heartbroken. - Deconstructor
I am so sad about this. She helped me so much when I left the Mormon Church. Her information and email correspondence was very assuring and helpful as I made my exit. I am so very sorry for this, I just can't believe it!
It was so thrilling to see her at the exmo conference and to applaud her for her service. In the eyes of the world it may not seem like much, but for me and generations of my family her efforts will always be will have an everlasting effect.
God bless you Kathy for all you have done. - Swedeboy
As an LDS church member who felt trapped and desperate, I was referred to Kathy by a nevermo friend of mine who told me he had discovered her website by accident. Bless her soul, she guided me through the whole process patiently and expertly and became one of my heroes in the process.
Whenever I realise that I am enjoying life more than I have in decades because of my newly-won freedom, I shall remember Kathy. - apikoros
Kathy helped many of us find our way out. She will be remembered! - JoAnn
So many people including myself owe her so much gratitude for all she was. I am really deeply saddened by this loss. She had such unbelievably deep impact on so many people struggling to break free from Mormonism.
These stupid words on a screen just aren't enough to cover the feeling that wells in my heart when I think of what an important and great soul we've lost and how much, never even having met her, I miss her anyway.
Goodbye, Kathy. - Tyson
What a terrible loss. Kathy has helped countless people out of the cult with her webpage. I hope the page will stay up to help many more escape the clutches of mormonism.
Again, what a terrible loss. - Charley
She helped me and never knew it. I'm sure there are hundreds more who could say the same thing.
Her citing of the legal precedents for resigning from a religion, along with the sample letters and words of encouragement were some of the factors in my resigning from the mormon church.
I hope they keep her website up...it's important. - Hermes
Oh, how sad. Kathy & I exchanged emails shortly after the death of her parner Sara. Kathy was was a warm, genuine person. She was obviously devastated by her loss. I hope through some Cosmic Force, she and Sarah are together again. - Jack's Wife
The news of Kathy's passing is breaking my heart. Please tell me its not true...
Kathy's website and posts on this BB gave me strength and helped me on my very first steps in transitioning out of the Mormon Church, in 1998. I first met Kathy at the 2006 ExMo conference, nearly a decade after first receiving the strength of her wisdom and strength of her convictions.
Kathy was truly a caring individual and represented truth, honor and integrity. She will be remembered always as a beautiful, loved and cherished person.
Her passing will not go unnoticed. Those of us who knew her all celebrate her courageous life and journey. - Rob
My sincerest condolences to her loved ones. Those outside the web of Mormonism probably cannot fully appreciate the enormous courage it takes to stand up to the LDS Church, even at the local level. Without Kathy's level headed and superb advice, I may not have found the courage to reclaim my life at the time that I did. She helped me and I'm sure countless others find our voices. I am saddened by her passing.
A light has gone out in the world. Godspeed, Kathy. - BrerRabbit
Mourning a great loss!
Kathy and her website provided the format and courage for me and my family to formally leave the lds church. She played an important role in our exit and I personally will be forever grateful. Thanks Kathy! - adamisfree2006
Oh dear, sweet girl. I echo every other comment here - it has all been said. I owe her a great debt. Sleep well sweet girl. - Brigantia
This is sad. I really admired Kathy who did so much for others without expecting anything in return. - Eric K
What a huge loss this is. I am sitting here with tears running down my face. Kathy helped me, just as she helped os many others. I know how terribly she felt the loss of Sara.
Gone in peace, Kathy! - Sus
My heartfelt admiration and appreciation to Kathy, a warm, caring, and courageous woman of principle.
She snail-mailed me a copy of a SLC Tribune article where I was quoted. I didn't ask and she wouldn't take postage money. It was a thoughtful and generous gesture. She shrugged off my thanks because such kindnesses were a way of life for her, nothing unusual, just an expression of her inner self. - Cheryl
My heartfelt admiration and appreciation to Kathy, Somehow, I kept hoping it was a mistake. I never met Kathy, but we spoke via email a great deal many years ago, and again when she lost Sara.
What an amazing woman she was and how wonderful the legacy she leaves.
Godspeed, Kathy. - Susanna
Kathy's website helped me. I am grateful to her. - nonmemberfriend
Kathy was a gracious and lively host at many exmo gatherings at her lovely home. Kathy touched the lives of thousands of people directly and indirectly.
I hope that she is now at peace. Those who attend her memorial service will be amazed at what she accomplished in her short life time. - cricket
I miss those get-togethers. Kathy so graciously opened her home to us and would grace us with her presence at other SLC get-togethers. It was always a treat when Sarah felt good enough to be able to attend. I spent most of the time at the 2004 exmo conference with her. Several times we cleaned the highway and a couple of times there were only 4 or 5 of us but Kathy was always there and we enjoyed going to breakfast afterwards.
When I first met her, she was helping me with my resignation. When I FINALLY got the bishop and SP to send it on to Dodge's office, it got stalled. So Kathy told me to call another guy in Dodge's office, I can't remember his name..Brother Somethingorother. She told me to tell him that Kathy Worthington said he could help me. The funny thing is that she also told me this person was very nice and helpful, which he was. He didn't seem at all threatened when I dropped Kathy's name, he almost seemed respectful of her. He immediately found my letter and told me that the response would be in the mail the next day.
For all the social action stuff Kathy was involved in, she was the farthest thing from "radical" or "militant" or anything like that. She was just a strong, quiet soul who commanded respect and had a great love for her family. I am so saddened today. Rest in Peace, Kathy. - NoLihoma
I know for me, like for most of you, she will live on in my heart. - brian-the-christ
What a shock. We will miss this very courageous woman who assisted so many in resigning from the LDS church. She was helpful to me in the process also. - SusieQ#1
She was so wonderful to me and helped me resign myself and my family. I also had the pleasure of a couple of mail and internet exchanges.
You profoundly changed the course of my life.
Thank you. If there is a journey after this one, I wish you a warm reception at your next stop, with Sara there waiting for you. - Punky's Dilemma
Oh My! What a terrible loss! She did so much for so many. She will be so missed.
My sympathies to the family. - jillian
How sad. My condolences to her family. - KimberlyAnn
She helped bring positive change to thousands of lives. Praise to the Woman. - winter
Condolences I sat next to Kathy for much of the conference in October. She was a lovely lady who was warm and welcoming. It was her who encouraged me to tell my story and just last month I used her letter template to finally resign.
She will be sadly missed. - scottishboy
That is a sad loss: I can only echo the sentiments of others and add that I also benefitted from the information she published. My deep condolences to her loved ones. n/t - flattopSF
We've All Lost a Good Friend.
Kathy was one of the first exmo's I made contact with, first at a get-together when Stray Mutt came to town and later at some social events.
Her fight for gay and lesbian rights was a monumental testament to her courage, as was her selfless aid to those seeking to leave the LDS Church, itself a symbol and purveyor of the narrow-minded bigotry and discrimination we all fight.
And that's not anti-Mormon; that's pro-truth.
There's more to say, but now isn't the time. I grieve. - SL Cabbie
She was wonderful. She effected so many lives in such a positive way. I miss her already. My sincerest condolences to her family. - SadHeretic
What a terrible loss. I'm shocked and upset to learn about it. Kathy helped me a great deal when I resigned from the Church. - Makurosu
Gone, but not forgotten. What a great friend Kathy was to each of us. She will be missed. - Hawk
Makes me want to officially resign as a tribute. - Taddlywog
I am so sorry to hear this. Sending love to her family - just wondering
I am sorry to hear the bad news. I used her example letter - when I left the cult. I never met her - but - her influence will be felt forever. Thanks Kathy.
Subject: Sad Irony: I just received today my final letter from Greg Dodge. Thanks, Kathy. - eighthman
I am still reeling at this news. Unexpected and tragic.
As many of you know, Kathy's website www.mormonnomore.com has helped thousands of people to resign from the LDS organization (sorry, can't bring myself to use the word "church"). - PtLoma
Such sad news. I relied on her website when it came time to write my letter and ask questions about the process. She was a true Internet pioneer in providing information to the DAMU. I spoke to her about my concerns when I resigned and we traded a couple of e-mails. She was so kind.
Condolences to her family, - Keith Vaught Cousin Exmo
I had dinner one night with Kathy and Sarah when I was in Salt Lake on business after having "chatted" with Kathy online. They were both so warm and friendly. I had such a nice evening with them. I kept tabs with Kathy via personal e-mail on occasion after that and the last exchanges we had were following Sarah's death.
I share everyone's sentiments - she will be sorely missed and I know she meant a great deal to all of you whom she helped resign.
My deepest sympathies to her children, family and friends. - S.
My heart goes out to Kathys loved ones. Kathy was a great support during my departure from mormonism. She will surely be missed.
Big love and comforting hugs to her family and loved ones. - GayRM
Kathy was kind, gracious and patient in the email exchange I was fortunate to have with her a few years ago and she was more than willing to go out of her way to assist total strangers.
In her memory, one thing I plan to do is to emphasize "resignation" rather than "name removal" from the Mormon Church as I know she felt strongly about that. I think she wanted to see exmos use their own terminology and not just go along with Mormonism's terms, in more ways than one.
Heck, maybe we could put a KathyWUT stamp on the bottom of every resignation letter to Dodge from now on.
From Kathy's site:
"Each year thousands of people decide to formally resign from the Utah-based Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which is popularly known as the Mormon or 'LDS' church. The church releases detailed annual statistics about membership numbers, but they never include the numbers about resignations.
This site was created to provide members of the church with information on how to resign from the church. The church calls this process 'name removal' and members call it 'getting your name off the records of the church' even though the church never removes a member's name from the records at all. What they do when you resign is indicate in the records that you are no longer a member, that your name was 'removed' on such-and-such a date.
It's important that you RESIGN from the church, not 'ask for name removal'.
Even though you have a legal right to resign from a church, the Mormon church isn't very gracious about letting people go. If they wanted, they could make the process efficient and they could treat resigning members with respect. Instead, leaders of the church have chosen to make it a lengthy and difficult process. Perhaps they want to make it an unpleasant process in order to discourage people from resigning. We'll keep trying to convince them to handle resignations promptly and with respect.
No matter your reason for wanting to resign from the church, this site is here to assist you with that process."
Yes, indeed. Kathy was there to help. I never had the opportunity to meet her and yet still I miss her already. - Nightingale
I used Kathy's letter as a guide when I resigned.
I always meant to send her a copy of my letter. I think she was organizing letters and requested resignation letters. I'm sorry I didn't do it.
Thank you Kathy. And to your family I am sending my condolences. I am truly sorry. - Hugs AnonyMs
I never met Kathy. I emailed her over some aspects of leaving the Morg in the UK. She was helpful and kind.
Kathy struck me as being the kind of person who is described as a rock, someone you could depend on.
She must have helped (directly and indirectly) thousands and thousands.
It was like Joseph Smith had put millions of people in chains, even down to our generation. And there was kind, wise Kathy, a grin on her face, using a cutting torch to burn through those evil chains!
Thank you, Kathy. Good bye. - Matt
Raising a toast to one of the rare, courageous, honest, practical, caring, down to earth people I know. I'll be eternally gratefull for what you gave me and my family. Love sister. nt - Koriwhore
I just cannot believe it, I am so sad Kathy helped me with some issues I was having and I so appreciated everything she did.
This news just breaks my heart. - Bonnie
A great loss..... Her's was the first web site I visited during recovery. - gayexmo
I'm really saddened by this. I did not know Kathy well and had never met her in person. However, she was very kind and helpful when by BIL and sister decided to leave. She gave me advice for them and actually later gave them advice.
She was a great presence on this board and she will be deeply missed by many.
I wish I had known her when I resigned. Her website would have been a godsend at the time, as I know it has been to so many people.
Rest in peace, dear Kathy. You are missed by many, many people. - Laszlo
She was such a good person and such a strength and inspiration to others. Will miss her. Peace to her loved ones and family. - steve benson
Kathy was a wonderful person. I didn't know her all that well, but she sent me encouraging emails in my darkest periods and was an inspiration to me. All my best to this wonderful woman and her family. - substrate
She showed up alone to help us pick up trash along the freeway for the Exmormon Foundation. What a great woman. - Dark Sparks
We met her at her lovely home at an exmorg gathering a few months back. I am shocked. Peace be with you. - JD
What will the world be like? without someone so influential, so kind, caring and loving?
I met her briefly last October and I thinked her for everything she did for me. I hope I can be that helpful to someone someday. She was the reason I reclaimed my power as a person, her reasoning behind RESIGNING and not "removing your name" was so powerful and touching to me. - esteban
We met her at her lovely home at an exmorg gathering a few months back. I am shocked. Peace be with you. - JD
She helped so many find peace. She will be missed - Vicky
Such a loss. The world lost a giant. She was a class act I admired and respected. Rest well, dear friend. - wings
In the end, she lived as she wanted to, and not as others who would try to control her in every way would have her live.
to paraphrase a movie line "live well, die free"
As I understand it, Kathy did both, even when times were rough, and what's more: she taught others how to do the same?
So I ask, isn't that everyone should strive to?
Rest in Peace, Kathy. - TheFlyOnThe Wall
I googled "Kathy Worthington" and "Salt Lake" and have been sitting here reading articles that mention the things she was involved in. There are so many.
The names of the Salt Lake idiots like Gayle Ruzika and the Buttars guy (the state legislator) who have dedicated their lives to promoting intolerance and hate are household names in Utah. But the name Kathy Worthington in only known in small circles. Here is a person who worked tirelessly to fight for the rights of all, who put more than her words behind the fight for cures for diseases, who gave so much comfort to so many. The reason her name is not known is because she didn't do it for name recognition or accolades or any other selfish reason. What a contrast between her and some of the "Christian" narcissistic idiots in Utah. - Gentle Giant
A life well lived. My family and I used her exit letter format. - Maura
She helped me at a time when I really needed it. Her website and posts here convinced me that contrary to my stake president's and bishop's claims, I really did have a right to resign from the church. I hope someone will continue her website and her great work as an advocate for those finding out the truth about Mormonism.
My warm wishes and condolences to her family. - Aphrodite
Deepest condolences to the family of a truly remarkable person. - HR
Who could forget the cheers and applause for Kathy at ExMo Conference 2006!
"No person is ever truly alone.
Those who live no more,
Whom we loved,
Echo still within our thoughts,
Our words, our hearts.
And what they did
And who they were
Becomes a part of all that we are,
Forever." - by: Richard Fife - tomthummim
She will never be forgotten by all those whose lives have been touched by her unselfish generosity. She was such a wonderful person and she touched my heart. - Saucie
Condolences to family and friends. She was obviously both bold and brave. - Shakey
Rest in peace, dear lady. - Rollo Tomasi
She'll be missed. She helped me in my exit. - Grape Nephi aka William
Thank you Kathy! She was a wonderful woman and a fantastic support when I left that cult. Thank you sister for being you! - Gail
Thank you Kathy for helping me and tens of thousands of others. You will be greatly missed. - Infymus
Kathy, we miss you. - Reader
I got to see her at the Ex-Mormon Conference. Now I am so glad I did. Kathy was one of those precious few individuals who are beacons of hope and inspiration simply by the way they live their lives.
I hope we will be able to continue and build on Kathy's work. I would not surprise me if several people will be needed to compensate for the work she committed to doing all by herself. - Latter Daze
Grateful for Kathy's life she spread her influence wide & encouraged many many lives. - Ruth/CA
I would have gotten to know her. I always assumed there would come a time when I would drop her a line for help when the time was right to formally quit.
Had I known she would leave us so soon, I might have acted earlier. Although I never knew her personally, I visited her sight many times and felt like she was a friend I just hadn't met yet.
I'm saddened by this news. My condolences to her family. - FeelingOfFreedom
A great lady who will be truly missed. - Cindy
Kathy, you will be missed. (Still can't believe this news!) - Heidi
You will be missed... thank you for all you have done.
I remember about 16 months ago coming upon Kathy's website for the first time, it was after I had concluded that the Morg was not what it claimed to be. I wept at my office desk as I contemplated resignation and reading about the process on Kathy's website.
Again, thank you for all you have done in the name of freedom. - Jn
Rest in Peace. Were it not for you, Kathy, my name would still be among the members of the LDS faith.
Thank you for the emails and phone calls, for encouraging me to resign, and for following up when I was apathetic about the local bishop's lack of response. Your form letter, which I modified with some not-very-nice statements, did the trick. I'm glad I had the opportunity to meet you at the Exmo conference.
May you and Sara be dancing together in Heaven. - Sideon
I remember following her advice, like threatening to involve the legal system, and bring bad press to the LDS church if they don't honour my request to close the Mormon account.
I'm sad. - Rastacat
Very sad news. I was so surprised at how willing she was to e-mail with suggestions on our name removal and how genuinely interested she was on my progress. I was sad today hearing this. Kathy, you will be dearly missed. - Susan D.
Why Kathy W mattered.
I didn’t even know Kathy Worthington personally, so part of me thinks it’s inappropriate to even be writing anything about her life. But there’s another part of me that feels that’s exactly why I need to be writing – because she’s someone who has had an impact on me simply because of what she represented, even if I didn’t know her personally. And I think that’s worth commemorating.
It was almost six years ago that my Mormon-centered paradigm came crashing down on me. As one whose relationship to Mormonism extended directly to the core of what I was as a person, it was a staggering blow that was to be more difficult to endure than I could have imagined. My loss of belief was, at the time, a direct threat to my marriage, my relationship with my children, and to the very purpose associated with most of my daily activities outside of my employment. Coming to terms with the impact of that on my life has easily been the most difficult thing I’ve had to endure so far.
As I began the multi-year journey of trying to redefine my personal paradigm, it was people like Kathy that stood out to me. The ex-Mormon world is filled with a large number of people who share their experiences from behind the cover of anonymity. Their stories are often poignant, touching, and striking and it is not hard to understand why they (including me) prefer to share their experiences without necessarily sharing their identities.
But there are others who shoulder tougher battles. Those who help lay the groundwork for others who are to follow. Those who are willing to step out to tackle issues and perceptions head on. Kathy was one of those people. Hers was a voice that was heard by countless thousands of people. People like me who, thanks to people like Kathy, came to realize that losing one’s belief didn’t have to mean losing one’s identity; that there is validity in the stunning realization that Mormonism is false; and that there is something you can do about it on an individual level.
She was one who helped epitomize the principle that Mormonism only has as much control over one’s life as what one is willing to give it.
It was just over a year ago that Sara died and I sent her a short email expressing my condolences. Two weeks later, on March 8th, 2006, she responded with a short note: “[xtbm], Thanks for writing to me during what has been one of the toughest times of my life. I am still grieving, but at least I'm not quite as overwhelmed by everything as I was when you first wrote.
Thanks for saying that I've influenced people in the ex-Mormon community. I hope that I'm leaving footprints as I go along . . . Hopefully I'll soon be back as an active participant in the exmo community.
That was the only personal communication I ever had with her and it saddened me when I re-read the email to realize how much she must have struggled this past year in coming to terms with that grief. But I hope she realized at some point along the way how deep and widespread her “footprints” reached; and that they will not be washed away with her passing.
So even though I didn’t know Kathy, after many years of personal struggle I came to realize the significance of what she represented. And I came to appreciate the things she must have sacrificed on a personal level that were never communicated in a public forum. She, and others like her, had a profound impact on me in my own personal battles over several years. I don’t know if this is the right way, time, or forum to express gratitude, but I’ll do it anyway in giving a heartfelt “thanks” for who she was, for what she did, and for what she represented. - xtbm
My daughter and I used her suggested exit letter to declare our resignation. THAT was a huge help to both of us, making the journey out of the cult just that much easier. I am grateful for that specific service that she provided for so many of us. - not the girl you used to know
Why Kathy W mattered not just exmormon activist, or GLTB (I'm a B), activst. She also voluenteered to help people.
She did more than Gordon B hinkley did! and she doesn't have the Trillions in some account, to blow on Temples, and malls. She with her mortal wife, and her mortal abilities actually improved life for others.
The LDS temple in Harlem, or in some 3rd country has failed to improve the Standard of Living for the people there!
shame on you Gordon! - Rastacat
Kathy and Sara really look alike don't they? They really were soulmates. I'm guessing people really do die from a broken heart. So sad. - Old Timer
What a wonderful tribute. I think it's beautiful that their ashes will be together. - can't log in here
I can't believe I never got to meet her.
I wrote my resignation letter with the help of her sample letter. I really appreciated her website and her help. - AnonyMs
She helped so many. I didn't know her personally.
I contacted her by email, referred dozens of others to her over the years. Her sample resignation letter was used by many, I am sure. - SusieQ#1
There are some amazing tributes from so many, including myself, who never even met her. I would bet she has more entries from people that never met her most other obituaries. I have felt a tinge of sadness the past day or two because her efforts helped so many people and she will be missed. I hope that she knew how much she really meant to other's and I am sure that she and Sara are happily together now.
RIP Kathy and thanks again! - adamisfree2006
I have never seen so many WONDERFUL tributes in a guest book!
I've read several guestbooks, and mostly there are about 5-10 people who have written ... and mostly they say things like "We are so grateful for Heavenly Father's plan so that we will be with our loved ones again...bla bla bla!" The tributes to Kathy are SO DIFFERENT ... so REAL ... so HEARTFELT, and not ONE of them is the "canned" Mormon response!
Thank you Kathy, for all you did to help me. Even through your own difficult times, you still reached out to help others. I am blessed to have been one of the beneficiaries of your kindness even though, like so many others you touched, we never met in person. - Lucyfer's Sister
She left her mark on society, especially mormon society with her bold MormonNoMore.com website.
Basically she kicked ass and took some names. Bravo. - Polygamy Porter
Kathy, I never met you but I went to your funeral last night to meet you for the first time and thank you for all you've done for my family and I and for the exmormon community. On behalf of all the people who you have helped in their exit from the cult, we thank you. - anonymous
Kathy, Thank you for your courage and strength during my difficult time in resigning. By providing me with the right words and instructions, the whole process was made less scary and painful. I wish I had been able to meet you in person and thank you for the help and the kind words in your emails, and most especially to get to know you. I hope you and Sara are together and happy and at peace. Thank you again. - lolafromoz
Thank you, Kathy, for everything. I grieve your passing, and treasure the life I am leading that is in no small part because of you. I am not wasting this gift of freedom, and neither will my children. - Punky's Dilemma
I shall miss the wonder of Kathy. She was an amazing person and offered so much of herself to assist others. Rest in Peace Kathy. - Metta, Helen
Kathy touched many in large and small ways, and I am thankful for her willingness to take a moment out and help total strangers struggling to get their feet on solid ground post mormonism. Thanks for giving all you had. Rest in peace. - Shish Kolob
I was so surprised at how willing she was to e-mail with suggestions on our name removal and how genuinely interested she was with my progress. I was sad hearing this. Kathy, you will be dearly missed. - Susan D.
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